As I sit in the peace and quiet this New Years’ morning, I’m
filled with a quiet joy as I contemplate 2012.
Yes, there were rough days, disappointments and heartbreak, but there
were also amazing moments of clarity, fun times, and a renewed awareness that I
get to decide – in each moment – how I choose to be. When I reflect back on things I have truly
done well, the biggest and most important undertaking of my life has been a
team effort…my husband and I working together to raise our three daughters.
When I look at them – three very different, yet strikingly
similar lovely young women – the little “aha” light bulb goes on, as in Oh, this is what it’s all about. I get it.
They are, as I said, very different.
Our oldest is joyful and outgoing, she is a preschool teacher in her
last year of college and brings creativity, fun and acceptance into children’s
lives on a daily basis, plus she has an incredibly contagious laugh. Her patience is extraordinary, and when put
into a room with a difficult child, she has them engaged in fun, educational
activities within a very short period of time.
She is positive, friendly and helpful.
In addition, she is fairly assertive and completely confident in letting
those around her know that she requires they treat her with respect.
Our middle daughter is athletic, intuitive and loyal. She is a soccer player through and through,
but can play just about any sport and will practice tenaciously until she gains
the skill she desires. She is in her
third year of college and wants to be a coach/trainer. Her style is encourage, support, encourage,
instruct, encourage, fine tune, encourage.
She has been training me, and though I’m out of shape and not a fitness
professional, she helps me feel comfortable and confident each step of the
way. She too is positive, friendly and
helpful. Less vocally assertive than her
sisters, but just as likely to walk away if she is disrespected.
Our youngest daughter is playful, compassionate and
fair-minded. A sophomore in high school,
she vehemently dislikes injustice and bullying and is willing to take a stand publicly
or in private. She is considering
becoming a chef and has become my staunchest supporter in regards to my gluten
allergy, remaking all of our favorite recipes so that, quite honestly, I don’t
feel deprived in any way. She’s still a
contradiction in the way of teenagers… positive then negative, friendly then
grouchy, helpful then sluggish. The
bonus – for me – is that I’ve been through this twice already, so I know the
positive, friendly and helpful will prevail.
It goes without saying that she is very assertive.
I guess, looking at the surface, they are different. But their values and the type of young women
they are? Very similar. Of course they have their flaws, as we all
do, but each day I’m taken aback by how incredible they are. And on this first day of 2013…I’m taking
partial credit for that. Not for their
accomplishments, which are their own, but for doing the work each and every day
to support, encourage and guide them toward becoming positive, friendly,
helpful and assertive young women. And
then, the real trick, letting them loose into the world to share their
gifts. It hasn’t always been easy, and
we’ve fallen down more than a time or two, but we always get back up and begin
again…and it’s completely worth it!
So Happy New Year! And
here’s to parenting audaciously in 2013!
:)
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